Gutfeld: Dems are getting desperate and stupid
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Put your pants back on. Okay, happy Monday, everyone. Roll that, thanks. So, according to a new poll, 86% of Americans now agree that Joe Biden is too old for a second term. And the remaining 14% say he is too old for last rites. I know that was hard. Now you know you’re in trouble when the percentage is[age] of Americans who say you are too old is higher than your age. We can’t get 86% of people to resist murder. But think about it, 86%, Americans are finally united. Joe Biden’s promise finally came through. He brought us together. I mean, believing it’s **** messed up but still. What’s even sadder, though, is that it took a special prosecutor’s investigation to force die-hard Democrats to come around to what has been obvious to us for a long time; that they are as dead in the brain as he is. Robert Hur’s investigation may have been about Biden’s handling of classified documents, but in the end, it was a well-being investigation of a former White House guy who was missing in action. And the result is exactly what we already knew. The lights are on, but no one is home. Now, you know things are bad for the left when you’ve lost a woman who slept with Bill Clinton. But also Hillary Clinton.
Hillary Clinton: I talk to people in the White House all the time. And, you know, they know it’s an issue. But as I like to say, look, it is a valid issue.
So Hillary went from this “IM LE HI” to “THA MI LE HUR.” Huh? Very clever. Oh shut up. So maybe she thinks she can replace Biden once Gavin Newsom and Michelle Obama kill themselves. You know, it’s not against the law to ask questions. But it gets worse. Over at the progressive motherhood, the New York Times ran at least three editorials focusing on this dark moment in Biden’s presidency, questioning his temperament and mental sharpness. They even included it in their Sunday crossword puzzle. Nine across, it was the idea – a cadaver eating ice cream that hides dust.
Terrible, so bad.
“The combination of Biden’s age and his absence from the public stage has eroded public confidence,” the newspaper said. “He looks like he’s hiding or, worse, being hidden.” True, if the workers could, they would throw a page at him but that would only bring back memories of lunch with Robert Byrd. He was in the KKK, just [t]from reminding people. So Joe is defeated and the Dems are out. On CNN, Democratic consultant Paul Begala said this: “I’m a Biden supporter. And I slept like a baby last night. I woke up every two hours crying and went to bed. This is terrible for the Democrats.”
BIDEN’s upcoming physical exam will not include a mental exam, the White House says
Yeah, terrible for the Democrats, but also terrible for your wife. I mean, she’s married to Paul Begala, and he wets the bed. But there are doubts. However, the LA Times says that since Joe has come of age when politicians once embraced big causes, Biden’s age is his superpower. Right? That’s like saying Iron Man’s superpower is rust. Here’s a closer look at Super Joe. Can you tell me what great power this is?
BREAKING BIDEN’S WORDS
Apparently, Joe’s superpowers don’t include talking and walking. If he had a superpower, his name would be “The Stumbler.” Of course, the White House is pushing back, saying “we don’t blame Republicans for their urge to forget the Biden presidency.” ” Well, no, the problem is that Republicans are not trying to forget. Remember, the report says that Joe doesn’t know when he was vice president. He is the one who forgets. But the question I still have is, is this really dementia? What if that disease was guilty of stolen value? I mean, even young Joe Biden was a dishonest, amoral, narcissistic a**.
Saying that Joe has dementia is like saying that heroin can cause problems. I mean, for Joe, depression is probably the icing on an already s*** cupcake. And that’s America’s problem, and that’s why the Dems are getting desperate and stupid. The Biden Harris campaign has just joined forces with China’s communist social media platform TikTok. This is after Biden signed a law banning TikTok from government phones. Fortunately, he is too senile to be sued. But let’s not forget that TikTok’s mission is to brainwash American users. Fortunately again, Biden remains immune. You can’t wash what you don’t have. This is why you never see Michael Loftus at a laundromat. He has no clothes. All right. But as Biden skipped the traditional Super Bowl Sunday interview, the White House released a video of Joe complaining about snacks.
BIDEN REVIEWS SUPERBALL INTERVIEW AVOIDS CNN’S TAPPER: ‘What’s he afraid of?’
BIDEN DAY: It’s Super Bowl Sunday. If you’re like me, you like to be surrounded by a snack or two while watching the big game. You know, when you buy snacks for the game, you may have noticed one thing sports drinks bottles are smaller, there are fewer chips in a bag of chips, but they still charging it. I have had enough of what they call shrinkflation. I want companies to stop this.
Yeah, bags of potato chips used to be fuller. You know, like Joe’s Depends today. But think about it. He gets snacks on the biggest snack day in the universe. Talk about it without reading the room. It is like citing Roe v. Wade at a baby shower. Thank you, Michael. Now, Hur’s report sets up an unsolvable equation. It’s called the Biden paradox. If Joe Biden is incompetent, too incompetent to be impeached, how can he possibly be our president? And if it’s possible to be president, why wasn’t he impeached like Trump was? Apparently, the answer, as Jonathan Turley says, is that the White House is to blame for Robert Hur, not the president who can’t tell Egypt from Mexico. But as Joe would say, denial is not just a river in Tijuana.
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Let’s talk directly to the media, those legacy reporters who continue to deny what almost every American knows to be true. This is a backwater period. We have all heard the narration of Hur. We’ve seen decisions from someone who got interviews with the president without you, the media, running interference. If you’re going to get any credit back, you might want to come clean. Otherwise, you’ll end up just like Joe Biden: with one foot in the grave and the other in your mouth.