I was miserable in my 30s. Then I turned 50, and I’ve never been happier – here’s the No. 1 reason why

0 4

Why higher emotional intelligence increases happiness

Emotional intelligence, which is the ability to understand and control our emotions, as well as being sensitive to the emotions of others, nurtures our relationships and builds our empathy.

This can lead to stronger social bonds. And as we age, our social connections become even more important to our well-being. With a heightened emotional intelligence, you will also be better equipped to grasp and empathize with the feelings of others, fostering deeper and more fulfilling relationships.

Here’s how my emotional intelligence has grown since I got older:

1. I feel more compassion for others

As I age, I’ve gotten soft…and not just around my belly. I experience less ego and more soul. I feel more deeply for the plight of other people.

Fortunately, I can direct some of that heightened compassion toward myself as well.

2. I am less emotionally reactive and more emotionally fluent

When I was younger, I had a kind of emotional vertigo; my feelings always made me feel unfair and unfair. I didn’t know how to dance with them. In fact, I often tried to overcome my feelings.

Today, I don’t sweat the small stuff. I can reassess negative experiences positively, such as being stuck in traffic in an Uber (definition: a good opportunity to reflect).

At the same time, my improved ability to recognize my patterns, habits and tendencies allows me to observe myself more effectively.

3. I don’t take things so personally

Don Miguel Ruiz, author of “The Four Agreements,” says: “A lot of freedom comes to you when you don’t take anything personally.”

This skill is especially valuable in our polarized, “turn off culture” era.

4. I have a better understanding of how to create my ideal environments

Social scientists call this “environmental mastery,” or the ability to determine the environments in which success will occur—and the ability to adapt and adapt to changes in those environments.

This also speaks to why, in the workplace, older people in a team have been found to create more “psychological safety” on teams: because their environmental mastery, along with their empathy, helping them create the right conditions for team success.

5. I value relationships more

It is said that the two questions people ask on their deathbed are, “Did I love well, and was I loved?”

Harvard’s long-term study of Adult Development and Blue Zones research clearly show that the relationships we cultivate in life can enhance our lives.

Of course, there are always people out there – Exhibit A: your grumpy 75-year-old uncle. But it is the exception, not the rule.

Chip Conley is the author of “Learning to love midlife: 12 reasons why life gets better with age.“After disrupting the hospitality industry twice, first as the founder of Joie de Vivre Hospitality, and then as Airbnb’s Head of Global Hospitality and Strategy, Conley founded METH (Today’s Elder Academy) in January 2018.

Do you want to land your dream job in 2024? Take CNBC’s new online course How to ace your job interview to learn what hiring managers are really looking for, body language techniques, what to say and what not to say, and the best way to talk about pay.

Inside a $1,600/month millennial beachside tiny home in Santa Monica, CA
Leave A Reply

Your email address will not be published.